I recently ran a little poll amongst my Facebook friends regarding what food they hate the most. There are few things as scientifically perfect as asking "friends" on a social network to reply to a poll, so here are the definitive results: the absolute most hated foods in America. For the record while recording all of this I became mildly nauseous.
The following received one vote a piece and thus tied for last place in our poll:
Broccoli - I thought this would receive more.
Curry - barely qualifies as a food.
Muscles - pretty vague, but I'll assume this are mussels of the seafood variety. Seafood appears very frequently.
Squid - score another for our friends from the ocean.
Cinnamon rolls - what??????
Butt - no comment.
Corn Dogs - yes, these are a ridiculous concoction on so many levels, chiefly nutrition.
Hot Dogs - only eat these at a baseball game to prolong your own life.
Onions - raw = disgusting, cooked = delicious
Capers - barely qualifies as food.
Tomatoes - surprised it didn't receive more votes.
Green Peas - small but potently bad.
Bleu Cheese - one of several specific cheeses mentioned.
Mustard - the darker the better
Tripe - easily my favorite response. I thought tripe was a joke. It's not.
Tuna Fish - surprising this was only mentioned once.
Berries - huh?
Homony - ?????????
Pickles - gross.
Eggplant Parmesan - texture of this is too much for many people.
Flan - fun to say.
Raspberries - seriously?
Anything with the Bone still inside - this wins for strangest response by far.
Spaghetti - ok
Cottage Cheese - imagine someone smacking on this, that sound, the horror!
Cauliflower - ears.
Olives - if they have the little red things in them, run, run fast and far.
Kale - best response by a guy named Kale. seriously my friend Kale hates kale.
Eggs - some people can't stand them, others of us live on them.
Sardines - does anyone still eat these?
Black Licorice - yes, terrible. Why was this invented?
This group received 2 votes each and thus qualifies for the bronze of disgusting foods.
Beets - yeah, these are terrible. Put them in a smoothie with a bunch of other foods that are really flavorful and you know what happens? They ruin those other foods.
Lima Beans - gag reflex activating......now!
Raw Oysters - texture is a huge factor in these responses.
Coconut - easily the biggest shocker for me. Some people really hate coconut!
Liver - hating this is as American as baseball and apple pie.
Cooked Spinach - of course this made it.
Anchovies - do people still eat these on pizza? Why?
Asparagus - makes your pee smell really, really.......pungent.
The following received 3 votes and will all receive a silver plate covered in these foods.
Cheese - most people love it. But if you hate it, you really hate it!
Mushrooms - texture, texture, texture.
Brussel Sprouts - no one likes these. No one.
Bananas - I was surprised this made the list at all, much less made the platform.
Cilantro - Biggest shock of the poll. I had no idea people hated cilantro. That's like hating Jimmy Fallon. He isn't great (like Conan), but he's not really bad either (like Jay Leno).
And the grand champion of them all by a long shot......your Gold Medal Winner.....
Mayonnaise - Mayo recieved more than 3 times the votes of any other disgusting food. It is the clear winner. I think we can use this information to call for an international ban on the substance punishable by death. I don't know if this is theologically correct or not, but I thought I read somewhere that God hated mayonnaise and that Satan actually bleeds mayonnaise. Either way, I think natural law has clearly determined that mayo is worse than radioactive waste.